--- a/bp/index.html	Tue Dec 17 22:30:59 2013 -0500
+++ b/bp/index.html	Wed Dec 18 07:37:13 2013 -0500
@@ -337,21 +337,21 @@
 <h2>Model the Data</h2>
 
 <p class="note">
-It is not within scope of this document to expand on the process of Linked Open Data modeling, rather we introduce how Linked Data modeling differs from the more familiar relational data modeling approach, as well as involving stakeholders.  
+It is not within scope of this document to expand on the process of Linked Open Data modeling however, we highlight how Linked Data modeling differs from the traditional relational data modeling approach.  
 </p>
 
 <p>
-During the data modeling phase, stakeholders should include at least one individual familiar with the logical model and schema of the existing dataset, e.g., a database administrator.  Including a subject manager expert on Linked Data principles will assist in the quality of the output and efficiency in the publication process.   
+During the data modeling phase, at least one individual familiar with the logical model and the schema of the dataset should be involved.  Typically, this person is a database administrator or application developer very familiar with the meaning of the data.  Additionally, including a Linked Data subject matter expert will assist in the modeling process.
 </p>
 
 </P
-The Linked Data modeling process involves representation of data objects and how they are related in an application-independent way.  For example, traditionally data has been organized for a specific purpose.  Over the last decade, more abstracted publication strategies have evolved with the Web to provide data independent of the application.  Linked Data takes this abstraction slightly further by representing things and how they are related.  
+The Linked Data modeling process differs from some other information management approaches by requiring the data modeler to represent data  objects and how they are related.  Linked Data modeling strives to produce a data representation that is application independent wherever possible. Over the last decade, publication strategies become more abstracted.  Linked Data takes this abstraction slightly further by representing things and how they are related.  Additional resources on data modeling are available on the Web and in publications.
 </p>
 
 <h3> Provide Basic Metadata </h3>
 
 <p>
-Always provide basic <a href="http://www.w3.org/TR/ld-glossary/#metadata">metadata</a>, including MIME type, publishing organization and/or agency, creation date, modification date, version, frequency of updates, contact email for the data steward(s). In the following section, guidance on the use of existing standard vocabularies, extending a standard vocabulary and creating a new vocabulary are provided as informative guidance.
+When modeling Linked Data, it is a best practice to provide basic <a href="http://www.w3.org/TR/ld-glossary/#metadata">metadata</a>, including MIME type, publishing organization and/or agency, creation date, modification date, version, frequency of updates, contact email for the data steward(s). In subsequent sections, further guidance on the use of vocabularies, as well as a vocabulary "checklist" are provided as further informative guidance as they play a key role in the Linked Data modeling process to encourage reuse.
 </p>
 
 </section>